Don't call me Israel yet.

I was going to refrain from calling anyone an idiot this week.

That was stupid. Just plain stupid.

Why was it stupid? Oh, please, let me tell you.

It's 9:50 a.m.. LS#1 and LS#2 both arrived just before 8:00 a.m.

Heard and seen in the last 2 hours at La Office de Stupidity:

LS#1: "What, exactly, is an affidavit?" e.t.a. To clarify--she said "What, exactly, is an affidavit? I am supposed to get an affidavit or sworn statement..."

LS#1: "I just got married a week ago and we've had several fights already. Hahahaha." (great start to your 4th marriage with a guy who still lives in Egypt, LS#1. Good luck with that.)

LS#2 makes copies of an order then hands the attorney the order. Does not put file copy of order in file. Does not give attorney file as she is leaving for court. Attorney calls from court indicating needs file brought over to her. LS#2 complains about attorney.

LS#2: "This 'post' weighs 14 ounces, so I'll have to take it to the 'post'. Do I put postage on it?"

LS#1: "What does (client last name) go under?"
Me: "(Client last name)"

LS#1: "These are two separate documents, do they get stapled together? Do they both get stamped?"

(Deep breath--exhale slowly)